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Sleeping

Our boy continues to do amazingly well.  He is adjusting to everything.  Most of the time this makes me extremely happy, but other times it makes me sad.  He is growing up so fast!!  I can't believe we have been together for over a month.  Sometimes I find myself wondering why time didn't go this fast when we were waiting for him, but really it seems like that was forever ago now.

I find myself so worried about different adjustments he has to make and how he will handle them.  And God continues to show me that he is in control.  And He is still doing supernatural things on this journey.

Just like the co-sleeping arrangement. 

When we got home, I thought "how are we going to move him to his own bed?  It is just never going to happen without a huge fight and lots of tears."  I was so anxious about it.  I fretted over it for a long time.  I can't even believe how easy the transition was.

Before I get in to that story, I wanted to say some things about co-sleeping.  It has come to my attention that there are very strong opinions on this subject.  To be completely honest, I never saw myself co-sleeping with my child and if I had given birth to a child I probably would not do it.  However, with this transition we felt it was completely necessary for bonding and boy were we right.  Our nights and mornings are just so sweet with him and having him in our bed made it even better for all of us.  We always knew we wanted to stop it though.  We feel it is important for him to be independent and not need us to be there beside him every minute (including in bed).  We also feel like we needed our own bed for our relationship.

Back to how we transitioned.  After talking to our social worker we decided we would try to move him to his own bed after he had been with us a month.  I have read other blogs about adoptive parents transitioning and everyone did it at different times, so we decided to consult our social worker.  After reading some articles about transitioning I decided we should start him out on our floor.  We did that on a Thursday night.  It was way harder for me than for him.  I cried all night and didn't get any sleep...while he slept great.  I KNOW I was meant to adopt a four year old and I'm very happy about getting him at this age.  However, I did miss out on those first years when I would have been able to hold him and swaddle him all day long.  Those nights he was in my bed were the best.  He fell asleep almost every night with his little fingers entwined in mine (I still get teary just thinking about it) and he would wake up and kiss me all over my face.  I understand why some people never move their kids out of their rooms, but I didn't want this to be about me and my feelings.  All of a sudden though...I lost my baby when he went to the floor.  He, on the other hand, handled it like a champ.  So we were going to try to move him to HIS bed that Monday night.  Like I said, I was WORRIED!!!!  I told people to pray and they were worried too.  I didn't want him to feel like I was abandoning him or that we didn't want him to be near us.  So God did a miracle for me...seriously...a miracle.  This NEVER happens and my social worker was shocked...

He told us Sunday afternoon that he wanted to sleep in his bed!!!  Can you believe it?  He made the decision himself!!!  I don't know if it was the fact that he finally noticed that he had airplanes on his sheets or that since we had been spending more time in the room (that was a strategic plan) he decided it was awesome to have HIS OWN ROOM.  Or maybe he just got to that point where he knew we would always be there for him.  All I know is that it was a complete God thing.  That night he still felt the same way and he hasn't looked back since.  I don't know if you truly understand how this was a miracle and how supernatural this was...just trust me.  When you take a child away from everything he has known for three years, the smallest thing can make him feel terrified and insecure.  There is just such a thin line between making him feel secure and making him experience new things.  I continue to rely on God to guide me in when to push him and when to hold back.

So here are some pictures.

This is just a comparison...his old pillow (the one on top) and his new pillow.

Here he is!  In his OWN bed!!

Here he is with "Goodnight Moon".  He has it memorized now and loves to "read" it to us.

And just so you don't think everything is perfect around our house...here is a tantrum!!  Remember, he is four, and we experience lots of whining and tantrums!!

Here he is saying "NO!  I don't want my picture made!"

Here is the fall out.

Here is the rolling.



So there you go.  Our journey is not without obstacles, but God is teaching us new things with each one.  Thanks again for all your prayers and support. 

Katie







    

Jonah and The Horse

While Jonah is still doing great with the transition, he is still quite scared of some things.  We are trying to force encourage some experiences! 

This past weekend we went to Shelby Farms and checked out the horses. 

Here is his new experience!

He was very excited when he saw the horses and he yelled "horse come!"

He wasn't so excited when the horse actually listened to him!!

He had a stare-down with another horse!

Then they all posed for a picture!

Then we decided he should try to feed him.  He wasn't thrilled with that idea so we showed him how.

We all tried it together.

In the end, he was VERY proud of himself!!!!

Jonah's Special Need

As you all know, Jonah has a heart condition.  I mentioned in an earlier post that we didn't want to talk about it much because we don't want it to define him.  While that is still true, I don't want to not talk about it and miss out on helping someone who might be going through the same thing or something similar.  So here is what he has:

3 congenital (which means it was present at birth) heart diseases:

Double inlet right ventricle
Pulmonary artresia
Patent ductus arteriosus

Here is what we know from what has been explained to us and what our non-medical minds can understand.

He only has two chambers in his heart instead of four and one of the chambers is significantly larger than the other.  His arteries and ventricles are also in the wrong spots.  So basically his heart is working faster and harder than most.  It is working double time.  The blood that comes in from the body gets mixed up with the blood that comes in from the lungs that needs to go out to the body.  So to back up for a minute to those of you (and me!) who haven't studied this stuff in years...here is what the heart does:

Blood comes into the heart that needs oxygen.  That blood is then pumped to the lungs to receive oxygen.  Then it goes back to the heart to be pumped out to the body. 

So all this blood is getting mixed up together and that is why sometimes his complexion apears blue.  The heart has pumped out blood that has no oxygen in it. 

He had mulitple surgeries to correct these problems.  For those familiar with these conditions, he has had a Glen surgery.  Which gave him a man-made (gortex) artery.  He still needs surgery for a Fontan which is another man-made artery.  With these two surgeries the blood that is supposed to come into the heart to be pumped to the lungs for oxygen will go straight to his lungs and bypass the heart altogether!!  Crazy!!!  I still can't wrap my brain about that.  That sounds insane...but it works.  Our cardiologist says that blood is lazy and if you make the route to the lungs the easiest it is going to go that way.  So on the other side of this...we have to make sure his lungs are clear.  So getting him to the doctor as soon as he shows signs of congestion is key. 

On top of all of this...he has situs inversus, which means that all of his organs are on oposite sides of his body.  Not that big of a deal, it just adds to his complexity. 

We went to the cardiologist the Friday after we got home.  It was a LONG morning.  But they were so nice there and they worked with us on everything because he wasn't showing up on B's insurance yet.  Which meant that our doctor couldn't put in any orders before hand.  So basically we showed up at the hospital and they worked us in, added us to the system, and basically changed everything to make sure we got what we needed.  Our cardiologist even asked one of the nurses to just stay with us the ENTIRE time!  The worse part was the echocardiogram.  Because he is so complex, they had to really search for things and figure out what exactly was going on in his little body.  It took an hour and was very uncomfortable for him.  Overall he did extremely well.  Our cardiologist said there were no surprises because the information we received before we got him was so good.  She didn't change any of his medication because it is working for him right now and now isn't a good time to experiment with his medication. 

Speaking of medication...he is on four different kinds plus a multi-vitamin.  I give him his medication three times a day.  What I have to do is crush his medicine and disolve it in water.  Then I have to extract a precise amount and give it to him in a syringe.  I was using a VERY sharp knife to do this until I researched pulverisers!!!  And here is what I got on Amazon (it was twice as much at Walgreens).

It has saved me a lot of time.  So if you need to crush up pills consider spending $6 and ordering this.  Our doctor has given me perscriptions for some liquid for two of the medications, but she told me how she hates to just throw away medicine when there are people around the world who can't get medication.  So I'm going to use the medication that the people in Hong Kong so kindly GAVE us.

Both our doctors (cardiologist and pediatrician) took a few moments to just stare at him and observe him.  They couldn't believe how great he was doing.  He should not be as healthy or as smart as he is!!!!  Our social worker thought the same thing.  We all think he is something extraordinary!!

If you didn't catch the part where I said he needs the Fontan surgery...that will probaby be done this summer.  We are of course scared about how this open heart surgery will affect him, but we are putting it in the Great Physicians hands and we are praying He will continue to guide us in deciding what to do!  He has guided us and Jonah this far and we know He will be faithful no matter what the outcome is.  We continue to praise Him and thank Him every day for this precious gift.  Please pray with us for these medical decisions that have to be made.

Thank you all for your continued support, love, and prayers.  We couldn't do this without you.

Katie



Adjustment and Attachment

As all parents know, there are definitely adjustments that have to be made when you bring your child home.  We knew this would be the case too, but of course we had no idea what to expect.  We were married 10 years without any children!  We wanted children during that time and it wasn't always easy, but we definitely feel blessed that we had those 10 years together alone.  God taught us so much during that time and gave us so many blessings.  So when we were sitting in the airport about to leave on our trip I looked at B and said "what are we doing?"  So many things were changing and I was scared.  The thought of the unknown was crippling (but I was still able to get on the plane!).  I had no idea what adjustments we would have to make and we have had to make some huge ones!  WE HAVE A 4 YEAR OLD LIVING WITH US!!!  And for the time being he pretty much rules the house and our schedule.  Don't worry...we are disciplining!  He doesn't get his way all the time.  But our TV shows, music, food, activities, and sleeping schedule are pretty much determined by him.  I don't want you to think this a bad thing.  For the most part we don't mind.  Friday night we took him to dinner, the book store, and Walmart.  We were in line at Walmart and I said to B "remember our old Friday nights?"  Then I looked at the cute little boy sitting in the cart and I felt so happy.  Yes, we have made huge adjustments, but we have also fit him into our lives and are quite happy about that.  He brings us so much joy and we could not have been happier with any other child.  We are so thankful God chose us for him and him for us!

The attachment process has gone a lot smoother than I expected.  Well, I don't really know what I expected.  It was pretty much instant and supernatural.  I can only thank God for this gift of attachment.  I don't think it is normal.  He LOVES it when the three of us are together.  Usually children attach more to one parent than the other, but I think he has really attached to both of us.  I prayed long and hard for that to happen before we met him.  If he gives me a kiss, he makes sure to give daddy a kiss too!  He is also doing very well with our family and friends.  We are being careful as to when and how we introduce him to people.  We try not to overwhelm him or do too many new things in one day. 

I don't want you to think it has been perfect.  There are days when the whining is too much for me!  The doctor visits have been horrible!  I have also been under spiritual attacks which I will discuss in another post.  Overall...this has been the best thing we have ever done.  God's timing was perfect!

Here are some pictures from the last few weeks.

Flying a plane with Grandpa at The Children's Museum

Fishing with Grandma at The Children's Museum



He loves breakfast!

He loves to "drive" cars.  Here he is with Pop.

Checking the mail with Mimi. 

Loving his jeep that Mimi Carlene gave him!

Chase (ShuShu) can make him laugh so hard!!

Hanging out at the Zoo with Samantha!

Two of my favorite pictures!!!!!

Making his daddy proud!!!

Thanks for all the prayers, presents, and meals!

Katie